she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize