you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
