i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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