Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I would fuck him just for his dog
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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