Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
