just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
