Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
