we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
