i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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