2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
