please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
