we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Alive.
So much puke
You need Xanax blowdarts
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
