dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize
