I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize