we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
