There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
