so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
