Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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