I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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