google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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