3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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