So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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