Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
BRING THE BAGELS
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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