I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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