Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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