i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
