i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
how drunk are you?
Several
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
