I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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