After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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