I'm going to jail i love you
I smell stomach acid.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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