But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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