my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
