is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
