Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Two words: blizzard sex
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
