You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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