Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize