Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
