Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I pour the whiskey from now on
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
