he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Randomize
