I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
