dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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