Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
