Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
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