Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
