You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
