I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
