If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
