we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He felt like a one man threesome
areolas are like halos for boobs.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Randomize
