I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
