when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
