Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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