Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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